Upgraded and moving out

In a few hours I will be having a surgery to remove my pacemaker from my lower abdomen. I am not sure why this prompted a blog, it just has.I guess a part of me is speaking from the 10 year old girl I was. The girl who asked her Mom what it was like to be an Angel, the 10 year old girl that knew exactly what it meant to die. I had no idea when going in for my 2nd open heart surgery that for the rest of my life my heart would not work on it's own. I had no idea that every 8-10 years I would be going in for a device change and surgeries were just going to be the extension that grants me life. I guess I just never thought that far ahead because that 10 year old girl never saw her future. I never planned that a metal device with a battery and some wires would allow me to live. What these devices have done is allowed me to grow up. They allowed me to play with my friends on a playground, be with my family for all the holidays, have birthday parties, sleepover's, family vacations, graduate, get married, be a Mom and see her future.I have learned to plan for tomorrow even though I know every day is a gift. I have been given the privilege of thinking about what tomorrow has to offer, but understand the honor it truly is. I cannot think of a better understanding of life then the one I walk in everyday. So with the new pacemaker and wires that were placed in Oct in my upper chest, a new set of scars and experiences ahead, I say goodbye to an old friend who kept me alive from the age of 10, was changed a few times in that location and most of all Thank You. I could care less about the fat I have grown to protect you with, the scar that will be re-opened for the last time today for it's story only belongs to me and I am honored to write a few more chapters.